A couple full days

The past few days have been very interesting. I have been praying for more of a social life, and BAM! I have three dates lined up for this weekend! Prayer is a powerful thing, and I am realizing this. I prayed for cheddar to come home, and he did. I prayed for direction in my life and my prayers have been answered. I am currently contemplating going back to school in the spring at Cleveland State University. I'm not quite sure which degree I will chose to pursue. I have also been praying for a push in the right direction. I know I will succeed at anything I put my mind to. It's just a big decision. I thought I had a career, It was my niche. Now, for some reason there is obviously a different plan for me. I am confident that I will have the appropriate answer when the time is right. I am exerting all my energy attempting to be patient. I prayed for patience once, and it was by far the worst day of my life. So, needless to say, I will NEVER pray for patience again, so I will just have to learn to be patient in my own time.

A few days ago, I received a surprising phone call. The caller called from an unknown number. Usually I don't answer phone calls from unknown numbers, but for some reason, I answered it. The voice on the other end of the phone said "HI". That's all it took for me to recognize who it was! It was Sister Mcneill! My heart was instantly warmed from the loving familiar voice on the other end. We had a good conversation, and we decided since she was so close to me that we would have lunch. I was tickled pink at the fact that she cares for me so much. I met her and Sister Soleberg at the church. It was then we decided to go back to their house for chocolate pancakes and eggs. We laughed, we cried, we shared good stories, and some not so good stories. Sister McNeill said something to me that broke my heart. She said that the light in my eyes was gone. I figured as much anyways, but hearing it from someone who loves me broke my heart. I want to have my light back so badly. I just know I'm not ready to get back into the swing of things. She made me promise to read a chapter from the BOM and write her a letter about what I thought and how it made me feel. I also promised her that I would heavily consider going to church with her. I told her that I wasn't ready and I wouldn't go unless my heart was into it. I originally got baptized because my heart was in it. I wouldn't have done it any other way. I know you are probably reading this and shaking your head at me, but IF i ever go back to church, it will be because I'm ready, not for anyone else but myself. Sister Titera took a few pictures, of Abi and I, and also Sister Soleberg, Abi, and I. I want a copy of it so I can post it. It was so nice to see her. My heart is warmed every time I talk to her. But, shes still on her mission, and I need to respect the fact that while she doesn't support my lifestyle, she still loves me. I told her that while I was in Utah, I felt like an honorary member of the McNeill family. Abi said, "you still are". I love the love I feel from y'all. Thank you